NaPoWriMo – Day Thirty – ‘Again and Again’

The final day of NaPoWriMo is here! I managed a solid 29/30 which is much more than I expected to accomplish. I have a tarot challenge picked out for May to participate in and have plans to post a poem for each day based on my readings, so hopefully I will still be active daily.

The final prompt was to write about something that reoccurs. Here it is:

‘Again and Again’

Every night, and sometimes day,
I lay my head down and I just lay.
I lay there and I think and I dream
And I hope and I worry at everything.

If I could sleep away every sorrow,
Lay down, say goodbye until tomorrow-
Or the next day, the next day, another day
Until, in time, I wake with some hope again.

I want to stop going to bed in equal parts
Of hope and despair, dreading but wishing
For what another day might finally bring-
I want to wake up and feel my heart sing.

I dream sometimes and I think other times
Of all the things I’d do if only I didn’t just lay,
Lay here, down here, dreading my future dreams
To act instead of thinking constantly of pointless things

Sorrows may grow like dandelions every day,
But could I not grasp them, could I not play with them
By blowing their spores into the wind with wishes
Causing more in time to grow, more little sorrows.

Again and Again, I lay my head down and say-
Maybe I can sleep away some sorrow today.
But every morning I wake up still waiting to know
If another day is full of hope or wasted until tomorrow.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-Nine – ‘Lilies’

Didn’t get around to posting this yesterday due to yesterday’s big storm – so here it is now! The prompt was to take a concrete noun from our favorite poem and use it as a anchor to brainstorm a new one. I my favorite poem is Tennyson’s Lady of Shallot (I even have a tattoo based on one of the stanzas) and from it I took the noun ‘Lilies’

‘Lilies’

We used to grow tiger lilies in a tub
At the edge of our old, rotting porch.
As a child I thought they were the world,
I petted their slim petals where they curled.

My childhood seemed so lily white to me.
My childhood seemed steeped in immortally-
I thought with kindness of the life I would live.
I imagined with gentle promise what I could give.

And I thought it all would last forever
As we all tended to once do, and whenever
I can I stand outside, find some sort of lilies
Any, I remember as a child, were my Achilles –

A hero from my not so white, not so pure past.
Short-lived was my childhood, while it could last,
But I can still remember the fragrance, and that gentle
Not-so gentle, way I dreamed of becoming something monumental.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-Eight – ‘The Goal’

I was a bit later than usual today, but I managed to work out a Skeltonic poem per the prompts request. Now, i’m a little mixed about this one. I like it, but outside of the words involved, I find putting this thought into words to be lengthy. Keeping my lines short was quite hard.. But a fun challenge. I might try this form again, later.. I will admit, this is not very dipodic. I kept switching between two and three stressed syllables, and I can’t seem to figure out how to keep myself at two.

‘The Goal’

Keep quiet love
Near – in a glove
Maybe, or above
And out of touch
To see but not clutch
At desperately – much,
Not overly much.
Sell your soul;
Comfort is the goal.
Keep it in control,
Keep quiet love –
Or I must get rid of
It, all of it, right here.
Keep it gone, or near-
Hush love, hush soul:
Living is not my goal.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-Seven – ‘Dreaming of Silence’

Today’s prompt was to do a poem on taste! I chose silence because… why not? Also I must apologize – Yesterday was full of unexpected surprises at work. By the time I got home at 1am I was dead tired and just went to sleep.

‘Dreaming of Silence’

A long night spent painfully quiet,
A taste of chalkiness, a sitting
Ungracefully on the tongue,
Heavy weight, foreboding.

It’s silence, uncomfortable silence,
And it tastes like that drink you thought
Was yours, but it wasn’t, it was a stranger’s.
How wrong it tasted. How wrong it all felt.

Dreams, dreams dreamed silently,
They taste so wrong in the back of your throat-
A bitter heaviness of sleep lost, thoughts lost
Sweetness replaced by a bitter irony.

Would coffee cover it – would anything?
Anything to wake up, to move on, to forget
How it came to be all your dreams were replaced
With silence, with that bitter heavy silence.

They say that when you dream in black and white
It’s because you judge the world as one or the other.
It’s silent and it sits heavy on the tongue, ashy loathing,
Acid regret sitting in the back throat watching and waiting.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-Five – ‘The Closet’

Today’s NaPoWriMo prompt was to explore a small, defined space. This was fun to write.

‘The Closet’

There are a few hundred mysteries to behold
Some hanging, some laying, some folded
Between all these cloths bought half-old
In that little closet of mine standing swollen.

There are shoes, semi-worn stuffed in nooks
Four shirts well worn, two pairs of pants well torn
A few various coats above the dresser slightly broke,
So much fabric lost and living, socks randomly sitting.

And I’m never quite brave enough to begin the cleaning
In the spring when I must decide between precious things-
There’s my jacket, from a friend in China, worn occasionally.
A quilt my great aunt made that’s never faced my bed.

Little lives lived in every string sown and cramped together
That I only ever see dug out every other spring and winter.
There’s a sewing machine used thrice and then forgotten,
My various bags and backpacks, a tent, a tarp, and hookah.

All the many little fragments of the hasty life I’ve lived
Are shoved into my closet when I can’t begin to comprehend
How I got this far in life – when did I buy this wig? Was it
This last Christmas? Where have all my socks gone again.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-Four – ‘Snails’

Today’s prompt was to do a ekphrasis about the art that appears in Medieval manuscripts – a fun topic. I loved studying that period’s literature in school, and have even been tempted to go to graduate school for it. Now, this is terrible, but damn was it fun to write.

‘Snails’

Every morning until a book needed to be born
There came the monks to help a wealthy lord.
They readied many inks, such blues, reds, and greens,
And cowhides collected, vellum made, a layout designed

They took their paints, their knife, and words,
They copied out another, new world – but tedious
So tedious, the days and nights would become
Their tired hands remained only so steady, a break-

A break for a picture or two, or some..
For a story does not keep a monks eyes bold,
But pictures, such pictures, clearly kept the script sold-
They painted such pictures to keep a reading stimulating.

You have the unicorns, the birds, ladies gossiping all in gold,
Knights fighting dragons daringly in red, green, blue, yellow-
But often there was no silver-point to follow and the monks,
The monks did as they felt not as they were told.

But snails, why snails? So many snails everywhere!
They decorated beautiful manuscripts, they were colored
With such care and spirit, yet nobody knows, nobody was told
Or left a letter to tell us why, just why snails were in everything.

These snails won fights. These snails broke knights.
Whole villages are shown trying to put up some sort of fight.
There are knights begging for mercy, stripped bare of all courtesy-
And none of it is shown in the story, none of it explained to give mercy.

Snails are just one of those medieval manuscript mysteries.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-Three – ‘My Write’

I like this form, the elevine, it feels very clean and prompt – a nice change from the usual hecticness that I’ve been experiencing lately. It was a welcome prompt for today, and I might play with it again, later on.

 

‘My Write’

Words
Gathering together
Inside of me-
Escaping, trying to become
Poetry

Poetry
Sitting there
On the table
Doing nothing other than
Existing.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-Two – ‘Don’t Care to Care’

I must apologize – I wrote all this half asleep(I’m just that exhausted from work). Around the end I realized this might not be a georgic poem, it doesn’t seem to have much in way of dealing with land or rural imagery… unless the thing you’re caring for is not land but rather yourself. You are your own world, your own land, your own nation- I suppose, and with that supposition this can be a georgic.. or not.

I tried, and now I must sleep. I’m existing on three-four hours of sleep and it shows. Please excuse the typos – there’s probably quite a few…

 

‘Don’t Care to Care’

There is no romance in suffering,
The inflection upon ourselves or earth-
But we are told it is such a natural thing
To deny ourselves such love from birth.

It doesn’t matter. I don’t matter.
For me, you might say, it won’t change
If I miss once or twice such little things?
Food, sleep, simply ease: why such outrage-

Suffering seems like such a natural thing.
Today I accept I lack what I might need:
Simple decency – for what makes me human
More than the need, the devouring need, a greed.

It might not matter, it will not matter
You think when you attempt a good deed
Knowing that life might as well give nothing
In return, but what if you did succeed?

Could it not be worth it? To see the world
A little brighter, a little lighter, cleaner, at ease.
When was the last time a break was made,
Small sufferings abandoned for a gentle breeze?

Stop suffering, stop daring yourself to fail.
There is no romance, no pride in pain
Gained from being too weak to treat yourself
Gently, like glass, when you know there is no gain.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty-One – ‘Spending Time’

Sorry for being late – My day off work was spent at work. Tomorrow I will probably be late as well as I’m scheduled for around 17 hours. Long day tomorrow… Anyway, today’s prompt was to incorporate overhead speech into a poem! Here you all go!
‘Spending Time’

I heard a woman singing today
“I don’t wanna give you all my time”
While we worked, worked long hours.
How powerful she was for singing those words
In a day and age, in a time and place,
Where all our time is money, pure money
Instead of a simple way to measure our life.

“I don’t wanna give you all my time”
When was the last time I spoke, not thought
To myself quietly that my time is mine.
When was the last time any of us was allowed
To demand our time, for blessed solitude or not –
I do not even remember when I last spent
My time, my very own life, on me without worrying
The money I was wasting not working or performing.
If only, if only I got to consume my own life
As strongly as she dared sing for her’s.

NaPoWriMo – Day Twenty – ‘Tired Rest’

Definitely not my best – I tried to the prompt for today, but that was even worse. So, without further ado:

‘Tired Rest’

I’m tired and I don’t know why
Except I do, and I bet you know too-
It’s been a long day, twenty-four hours,
Sixteen of which require me to be awake.
Thirty minutes to shower,
Thirty minutes for breakfast,
Thirty minutes to get to work.
Four hours, hour break, four more hours,
Anther break, this time thirty minutes,
Two and a half hours of work again.
I blink and it’s been thirteen and a half hours.

I get paid for eight, due to laws.
The pay is decent, also due to laws.
My boss tells me to work less, schedules me more
I work six days straight, make a nice paycheck
And spend my day off asleep, trying to rest.

I suppose I could spend my checks,
After they remove the taxes first…
Taxes for the roads, the school, the president
And his three million dollar weekend,
(A needed break, we’re sure, so sure)
On self-care, self-help, or self-success,
Except I’m too tired by the end of the day.

But I still have two and a half hours
Out of the sixteen that are required of me-
Or, well, I did but I spent them trying
To find out why I have been so tired.
Now that the times up, I must go to bed-
Another long day waits as I take time to rest.